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How To Turn Your Mess Into Your Message

  • 4 min read

Create the most powerful stories.

You’re lying on the floor. Crying.

Your stomach is in knots.

Your heart is beating wildly.


Well, everybody has got something.

Unemployment, divorce, an abusive relationship, cancer, or (mental) health issues.

When I started my Medium coaching sessions in autumn 2021, a business coach and friend of mine said:

You’ll see. In the beginning, your Medium coaching sessions will be about the nitty gritty. As soon as you have a personal connection, they’ll tell you their messy stories behind writing online.

She was right.


I got patients on TV.

I even encourage my coachees to share stories that are a little bit messier.

One of America’s most beloved broadcasters and cancer survivors, Robin Roberts from ‘Good Morning America’, loves to say

Make your mess your message.

Yes! In my opinion, nothing replaces the human connection.

I started my corporate career in an international agency called Edelman. I became a Public Relations consultant.

I helped companies and brands to gain momentum in the mass media and build genuine relationships with TV, newspapers, and broadcasting stations.

To connect (with) people was my job as well as my passion.

I connected, for instance, testimonials suffering from a rare disease or cancer with the media. I prepared the patients for their interviews.


People who fake it are doomed.

I genuinely take interest in the people I connected with.

People shared their deeply personal stories because they know I cared about them.

In the long run, you can’t fake empathy and genuine interest in others.

There will come a point (in your corporate career) where you have to communicate authentically — to stay mentally healthy.


Your mess doesn’t make you weak.

When it comes to writing online, people are frightened to tell their personal life stories.

Although these stories are the most powerful ones.

I tell my coachees to at least give their readers a dose of who they truly are and what they are struggling with in life.

Telling your messy stories are not a weakness.

That’s what most writers are getting wrong.

It’s a strength.

The moment you take the leap of faith and allow yourself to be vulnerable, you’re showing strength.


The secret to getting ahead is to build strength from vulnerability.

Whatever it is you’re going through… the secret to getting ahead is to build strength from vulnerability.

Share your opinion. Share your voice.

Tell your story and make your mess your message.

Here’s a little exercise:

What can I do to make my mess my message?

Take the time to understand

  • Why was this (tragedy) placed in my path?
  • What am I supposed to learn from it?
  • What can I share with my readers so if they’re going through this, they’re going to be helped?

This is how your readers could react:

What? Really? Oh, my gosh. Tell me more! I can so relate.

Let me give you an example from a new and very successful Medium writer who earns $500+ per month with his vulnerable stories.


Learn from the bad and embrace the good.

Photo by Hanna Postova on Unsplash

My friend Chris Freyler is Top Writer in #Relationships, #Psychology, and #Mental Health.

He shares his relationship stories on Quora (14K followers) and Medium (2K followers).

Every person that we allow in our life is a direct reflection of our demons and angels. Take the lessons as they come. Learn from the bad and embrace the good. Chris Freyler

Chris writes about childhood trauma and narcissistic relationships.

It’s all about being of service to others through what you’ve gone through.


Final Takeaways

I encourage you to share your messy stories.

  • Make your mess your message.
  • Turn your pain into a purpose.
  • Turn your trial into your triumph.

Paint a clear picture in the minds of your readers so that they can visualize your situation. Not just tell them. Show them.

At least weave elements of your messy story into your posts.

Your readers will see that and thank you for it.

© Kristina God


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