It’s not your fault but put a stop to this.
“I’m just not cut out for this,” she told me on the phone. “I’ll quit.“
“I mean, you have to be realistic and just stop, don’t you think?”
This phone call really irritated me.
My friend is smart, an expert in her field, and she was talking about her side hustle — a life coaching business she had started at the end of 2020.
In 1:1 sessions she helps other people to attend their goals in life.
In 2022, she wants to give up on her own goals.
My friend felt crushed
Throughout our phone call, I had the feeling she was trapped in a psychological downward spiral.
Although in 2021, she launched a weekly podcast where she interviewed experts on resilience and self-awareness and published one blog post per week, she was frustrated and felt stuck.
According to an article in the Harvard Business Review, a person who overestimates their goals and fails to achieve them can feel crushed.
especially those who put a great deal of time and effort into a long-shot goal, failure can be a crushing blow.
Over 90% fail to achieve their goals.
When I asked her about her big goal she said money.
She wanted to earn $$$$$$, quit her job. She failed.
This statement caught my attention and I did some research.
I discovered, my friend wasn’t alone.
Yesterday evening, I joined NYT bestselling author Michael Hyatt’s class Become your best in 2022.
I learned that…
- In fact, 74% of people in the US set goals for the new year.
- Only 12% believed their goals were unrealistic. Meaning 9 out of ten believed their goals were reachable. Just as my smart friend.
That's just crazy because over 90% who set goals failed to accomplish them.
Creative and talented people fear success.
Hyatt explains there's a gap between what many believe they can do and what they actually achieve.
He says it’s not their fault. They just don’t know what to do.
They just set unattainable goals and at some point, people just give up trying.
You might say:
How can this young woman be a life coach when she don’t know how to set goals for herself?
My explanation is this:
Oftentimes talented and creative people fear success more than failure.
Success is the scary part of their side hustle or actual business.
Accomplishing your goals often doesn’t bring the euphoria you expected.
Rather, it leads to more pressure and expectations.
Dare to shrink your expectations about the future.
When you think of your past goals. Have you ever felt stuck?
To set yourself off for success in 2022 the biggest challenge is to think about your goals differently.
- Shrink your expectations about the future.
- Set your goals even lower and with purpose.
- Set goals that are inspiring and keep moving you forward.
A person's belief about what is possible for them in the future gets a little dimmer.
Their dreams get a little bit smaller.
But that’s okay and healthy.
Final Takeaway: You’ll fail if you don’t try.
There’s a gap between what many believe they can do and what they actually achieve.
Put a stop to feeling discouraged about not reaching your writing goals in 2021. That’s irrational.
With a high probability, your goals were unattainable and therefore made you feel stuck.
Learn from 2021 and don’t make the same mistakes again in 2022.
- Shrink your expectations and set goals that keep moving you forward.
As Wayne Gretzky, a famous Canadian ice hockey player, once said:
You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.
You can fail.
But I guarantee you you’ll fail if you don’t try.
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